I learned many years ago how damaging these stereotypes are, and how the latter is indicative of a separate illness, Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder (OCPD). I’m so OCD! is the catch-cry of the person who has no idea how debilitating OCD can really be. Most people picture someone washing their hands into red rawness, or even worse, as someone obsessed with alphabetising their books or pencils. So many mental illnesses are horribly portrayed and misinterpreted by the general public, and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder is no different. Reading about mental illness, and learning how they are stigmatised by society, has been helpful and useful. I’ve read more books than I did in 2018, but it’s been more nonfiction than fiction. 2019 has been a bit of an interesting reading year for me. This paints the image of Obsessed: A Memoir of my life with OCD by Allison Britz.
Her GPA and friendships all but obliterated, Britz in a moment of desperation called her mother, and eventually was diagnosed with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) by a local psychiatrist. Eventually, she got to the point where she believed that failing an exam worth 25% of her grade would delay the inevitable brain cancer. She sabotaged friendships, believing the well-intentioned words by her friends were threats to her livelihood. Over the following weeks and months, the dangerous list lengthened: she avoided hair dryers, towels, most of her clothing, the colour green, certain foods (except foods she had bargained to herself were “okay” if she avoided walking on cracks), her mobile phone, and computer. After obligatory driving lessons with a Christian driving instructor, Britz began believing her thoughts were religious in meaning, and began new religious rituals. Soon, Britz was walking between classes on tiptoes, avoiding cracks, counting her footsteps out loud, having a certain number of steps to walk between locations.
Avoiding sidewalk cracks would ensure the safety of both Britz and her parents. The old childhood rhyme Step on a crack, break your mother’s back, roared in her mind with a vengeance.
And she would do everything within her will to make sure that never came true. Awakening from a vivid dream in which she had terminal brain cancer, Britz decided it was a warning. One day, she was just your typical high school sophomore she excelled in track and field, was an A-student set for the Ivy League path, and had loving parents and an assortment of close gal pals. The nightmare changed everything for Allison Britz.
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